Tuesday, June 26, 2012

Actions and Results

If anyone would have asked me seven months ago if I thought I could ever be this happy I would have laughed in their face.  I knew the program of Alcoholics Anonymous worked, i just did not know that it would work this fast.  My spiritual growth has transformed me into a new person.  I finally made my most difficult and most important amends last week, and that, I believe, finally allowed GOD to enter into a relationship that had been sick for a very long time.  My sponsor told me to hold off on making the amends and pray for this person for two weeks and see what happens.  After a series of events that were clearly out of my hands driving me closer to this person, the opportunity for me to make the amends walked up to me and jumped into my lap (Which a guy named Eddie in Hilton Head told me would happen)!  After two months of not speaking the first thing I did in the conversation was make my amends and IMMEDIATELY,  all the pain, fear, resentment, distrust left.  The sickness had been lifted.  I cannot put into words how much joy this brings me.  Ultimately, what brings me even greater joy, is that I did what I was told to do by my sponsor and I got the result I wanted.  For so, so, so long I have fought everyone about everything and I was hellbent on doing things my way.  Well look where my best thinking got me.  Fucked up on drugs and alcohol for twenty plus years and broken!  So, if there is anything I can share with anyone out there that is still struggling with drugs and booze, get your ass to a meeting and get the fuck to work.  I am living proof that it works if you work it.  Go to meetings, get a sponsor, work the fucking steps and do your service work.  It is that simple... Now just because it is a simple program does not mean that it will be easy at all.  It does take a lot of hard work and commitment.  I dont know about any one else but my life deserves all the hard work I can give it.  You would have to put a bullet in my head to ever get me to walk away from AA and pick up another drink or drug!  I am 38 years old, living at home with my parents, in a city I hate, 2000 miles away from the person I love the most, and today I have peace.  A peace that I have never known in this lifetime.  This only means that the work is just beginning.  Next step, sponsorship!

Believe in the power of prayer!!!!!  It works!

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